Don't worry... they're a democracy...

So the decision on Korea is final: I'm going to the Republic of Korea. I still don't have a contract but I have an interview with the Seoul Metropolitan Office of Education tomorrow and they will love me. I just have to make it obvious that I love them, and I know that won't be too hard.

So I've changed the ol' blog a little bit and I'll probably start a brand spanking new one when I leave the West behind.

I've also updated my myspace account (Ratchy Ratch) because I have nothing better to do here in Calgary. Fuck I'm bored.

Our landlord told us via e-mail that we cannot stay in the house we're renting for the month of August. She wants to do renovations and said it'll be easier to do with no tenants. Thanks for the notice bitch. She's a flip floppin' Albertan who wants to sell this house for $420,000 when the reality is that its a piece of shit. Well, it ain't a piece of shit but its old, it leaks, and its on a busy street. I hope it burns down when we move outta here.

The prices of real estate (and rent for that matter) is ridiculous here in Cowtown so instead I'm gonna move to one of the most expensive cities on Earth: Seoul. I've read a few lists and South Korea's capital is listed anywhere from number one to eight in terms of cost of living. I've done my research and it can cost up to $9000 (Canadian!) a month to rent a house for a family of four. Thankfully, my housing will be provided and without the ridiculous cost of rent I should be able to do ok. I'll lose a LOT less money in tax as well so my decision is made.

I look forward to living in one of the most developed and prospering nations on the globe. South Korea has everything we have and they apparently have a higher per capita rate of internet use than Canada. I'm not sure if I believe this but I've read that you cannot go 50 yeards without an Internet Bang (cafe). I'm also curious to see how an Asian democracy differs from our own. I bet they don't take any shit from their partisan opponents. I bet they're tough. I bet they fight for what they believe in.

I bet they fight.


Actually, I bet they're all fighting for that hot politician momma. Even the little old lady down in the corner wants a piece of that ass. Or she wants to shove a fist up it? Maybe that's common policy over there?


So anyways, here's my plan: I'll sell my Seoul to take a ride on the Seoul train to prove to everyone that I've got Seoul. My Seoul purpose for this Seoul searching journey is to save my Seoul.

Seoul.

And I also wanna marry a woman I can't communicate with. That would be Seoul fucking awesome!

There's no such thing as a black angel...

I'm not a racist and once again I've changed my mind regarding a major life decision. This week's plan is to go to Korea and teach English for a year. I've made it to Alberta and now I'm just about ready to leave. I don't really know if I wanna leave this place or if I'm just not ready to take a real teaching job here in good ol' Canada.

There are a few factors pulling me away from here. First of all, Calgary is way too expensive. It's okay right now because we have a sweet deal on our house because the owner is trying to sell so we have to put up with real estate agents showing the house and renovations. But when I move out of this place my living expenses are going to triple because not only is our rent dirt cheap in this house, but our phone, internet, electricity and every other bill is included in the rent.

Secondly, I don't want to teach in a little shithole of a community up North somewhere. I just sent an e-mail to turn down a job in Red Earth Creek by Loon Lake (like anyone knows where that is) and to be honest, I'm not sure if it was a great decision or not. I just know that a year up there would probably be too long, and they don't have broadband in people homes, just at the school. I need high speed internet. I hope they have it in my apartment in Korea. Time will only tell if I'm doing the right thing.

Third(ly), I was considering staying in the Calgary area and substituting in September. After I did some intensive pondering, I decided that I wouldn't make enough money to pay off my student debt, rent, pay for car insurance, etc. because Calgary is way too fuckin' expensive.

So after I thought over the above three circumstances, I sent an application to a company that recruits teachers. I talked to them last night and I have a week to decide whether I want to teach in a public school or a private one in Korea. If anyone reads this and they have any advice, please share it with me. Even this decision is making my little brain hurt.

And oh yeah, by the way, "THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS A BLACK ANGEL."

(I'm not a racist and this was nothing to do with anything that most people will understand. It's an inside joke from a night when things kinda lost control. Once again, I AM NOT A RACIST, well, that is unless you consider Muslim Extremists a race. Someday I may explain the circumstances regarding these angels here on the ol' blog, but not today.)

Live at the Beaver Lodge...

I was offered my first official teaching position today.

Pukatawagan, Manitoba. Home of Sydney Castel.

This is a Cree Nation Reserve about 900 kilometres North of Winnipeg. In the 1950's there was a major diesel spill and in 1987 they realized that the ongoing health problems were a result of this accident.

The children were shipped to neighbouring communities because the school grounds were highly contaminated and a child's education cannot be sacrificed. This lead to a spike in the suicide rate amongst the youth and gangs became a problem, "recruiting and preying" on these lost souls. I'm not sure if this happened in the Puk or at the other towns but either way I don't wanna mess with no Indian gangs. No sirree.

And on top of that, this town is very isolated. More isolated than Arnold when the Governors talk politics. There's no road access until the lakes and rivers freeze over but there is just one problem. These ice roads haven't been freezing over because of all the global warming the Indians have caused to their land.

Despite this` there is one awesome thing about Pukatawagan and that's Sydney Castel and his hit the "Pukatawagan Song." If you haven't heard it you probably won't find it. A girl I work with burned it on a cd for me. She's from Manitoba and told me not to go the to Puk.

The song is obviously funny but in a very odd way. I can't really explain how unique it is. The music is pretty bad, just a cliche acoustic guitar strum with cheap MIDI backing. But the vocals... Oh the vocals how they are so special. Out of key and lacking rhythm, he manages to create a very catchy poorly phrased masterpiece that touches the heart.

Well, touches the heart on the funny bone at least.

If I don't find his album as a pirate I may actually purchase it. It'd be worth every penny. "Live at the Beaver Lodge." What a title. They also have some good novelty t-shirts going around Manitoba. A nurse told me about one shirt that said "Pukatawagn University: Puk You!"

Guess what? I want one of those too...